We had a great Christmas holiday.
I've spent the past three days reading. This morning I woke up and realized that I had no where to go and nothing to do so I didn't even bother to get out of bed until 4PM. I read books all. day. long. There aren't even words for how much I loved it. It's also a wide revelation that I could easily become a dormant creature who leaves society for the love of words....or maybe the occasional movie.
The children had bean burritos from Taco Time last night for dinner; Peanut butter sandwiches for breakfast; McDonalds for lunch--and then I finished Allegiant just in time to make everyone eat "Big Salad" to make up for their mother's neglect. Hoping that overdosing on the fiber will make up for the complete lack of nutrients we have (not) consumed in the last week.
Mike & Ike's contain no actual fruit.
I took the kids to see Frozen before Christmas. Well, not Louisa, she had to stay with Angie. I didn't think that she could keep it together. Jack and Lachlan both loved it. I thought that Lachlan's eyes would come right out of her head when Queen Elsa builds the ice castle. Princesses and their castles are at the top of her cool list, right next to Pegasus and Unicorn. Tonight we saw on the news that some guy in Midway is building an ice castle and she is convinced that we need to drive out and tour it.
Jack literally knocked out a loose tooth today. Jeff hauled Lachlan to her allergy shot this afternoon while I stayed home in bed [reading] and Lou took a nap. Jack came home from the appointment screaming and running to the bathroom bawling. I thought for sure he had "overeaten" something and thrown up in the car [this happens alarmingly often]. Instead, he was screaming that it was "Dad's fault that my tooth got knocked out cause Dad was driving crazy and turned too sharp and my face hit the back of the other seat!" It was hilarious and I think the entire family was relieved that vomit removal wouldn't be necessary.
There were a few tense moments before Christmas where I was worried if we would have some PTSD with Louisa, but I think that we were able to get on top of it. A week ago the kids went with Jeff to Aunt Karen's and they got really wild and wound up with all of the cousins; when they went to go home Louisa threw a massive tantrum and screamed the whole way home. She kept on screaming for another 40 minutes after getting ready for bed. It was awful and so stressful. She was an absolute pill the next day and as Jeff said, "I think we broke her brain." Sometimes you just forget how hard making transitions can be for these kids. On the Sunday before Christmas, Santa stopped by and left some stuff in the Christmas box. The kids were so excited and started talking about how Santa is always watching--we got laughing about how Lachlan used to say that "Santa was sneaking around and always peeking in the windows". It was too much for Lou because she started telling me that "ho ho ho is scary!!" We laughed out loud until Jeff snuck up behind her and broke her brain again by saying, "ho! Ho! Ho!" She screamed out loud and leapt up on Jeff's lap and told him that "the Ho Ho Ho coming! Ho Ho Ho scary!" Well, that night she had horrible nightmares. The first time I heard her crying she was soaking with sweat. I had to peel her jammies off her to dry her off. The second time she clung to me and cried to hard that she "stay here, no go back!" Jeff and I aren't sure if she meant that she didn't want to go back to her bed or if she was frightened that Santa was going to come and take her back to the orphanage. Either way, she slept in my bed and I didn't sleep all night feeling sick about her being scared of being taken away. Susie reminded me that on her last days there they gave her a bunch of presents and had a party so maybe it was all too familiar in a bad way. I was really sick about it. After that, Santa never came to the Christmas Box at night. It was much better in the morning. I also arranged to take her to Santa at the mall. She was a little nervous, but she pulled on his real beard and told Santa she wanted a baby. From then on, the Ho Ho Ho wasn't scary anymore. We also really reeled it in at the family Christmas parties. We made her stay with us the whole time--which she hated [angry eyes]--but not a tantrum in sight. She was even able to keep it together long enough to participate in the nativity. Speaking of which, Lachlan calls it the "nate's-tit-vity." I'll probably never be able to say the word without a bit of cringe again for the rest of my life!
Stacy and Mark have been in China for the last two weeks picking up their new daughter. Today is our 5 month anniversary since we've been home with Louisa. Where has the time gone? I think that we've done pretty well. I've had so much anxiety for our friends because the feelings of being there are so overwhelmingly stressful. All you can think about is getting home--and all you can worry about is getting home. I wish that I could put the experience and feelings in a jar and sell it, but then nobody would ever adopt internationally. No. Seriously. Because you have to have a bit of naivety to get yourself on the plane--you have to believe that you can do it--if you felt that way before you left there would be no way you could take the leap. I know that that faith that "He would make a way out of no way" was my biggest blessing this year. There have been times over the last few months when I have honestly been locked in my closet [so nobody would die] and I have said, "How in the world did I get here? What have I done?" I know that the answer was nothing more than shear obedience to the Lord's will [both adopting and staying in the closet]. It wasn't the easiest thing, but it will be the best thing for us and I am feeling so blessed to know it.
Here's a few random shots from the holiday:
